Benjamin Franklin once said “An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.” so I decided to invest in mine by drinking copious amounts of green tea whilst scrolling through the Urban Dictionary (Same thing ennit?)
Here are my favourite phrases/words that I came across:
- Phrase: Web Shite
Definition: A website full of shit.
- Word: Loaf
Definition: When a fat cat sits laying on its stomach with its paws tucked under them and they look like a loaf of bread.
- Phrase: The brown touch
Definition: When everything you touch turns to shit.
- Phrase: Coordination tongue
Definition: The act of unconsciously sticking ones tongue out while engaging in an activity that requires mental skill, physical coordination, and/or dexterity.
- Word: Vegaquarian
Definition: Like a vegetarian, a vegaquarian does not eat meat only they don’t recognise that sea animals have feelings too and eat them also.
- Phrase: Sidewalk Salsa
Definition: When you walk up to someone on the sidewalk and you both try to move out of each other’s way, and in doing so repeatedly move into each other’s way.
- Phrase: Defensive Eating
Definition: Strategically consuming food for the sole purpose of preventing others from getting it.
- Word: Internest
Definition: The cocoon of blankets, pillows, duvets, and comfy things you gather around yourself to keep warm whilst spending long amounts of time on the internet.
- Phrase: Freshman at life
Definition: Someone who simply has no clue what they’re doing in life. They have no common sense and ask stupid questions such as “how do I do laundry?” or “what is online banking?”
- Phrase: Nicholas Cage Syndrome
Definition: When you have the same facial expression no matter what emotion you’re supposed to be showing.
- Phrase: Deja poo
Definition: The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before.
So there you are. Don’t say I never teach you anything.