11 words/phrases that will help you pass your exams. Not.

Alright Champs?

Benjamin Franklin once said “An investment in knowledge always pays the best interest.” so I decided to invest in mine by drinking copious amounts of green tea whilst scrolling through the Urban Dictionary (Same thing ennit?)

Here are my favourite phrases/words that I came across:

  1. Phrase: Web Shite

Definition: A website full of shit.

  1. Word: Loaf

Definition: When a fat cat sits laying on its stomach with its paws tucked under them and they look like a loaf of bread.

  1. Phrase: The brown touch

Definition: When everything you touch turns to shit.

  1. Phrase: Coordination tongue

Definition: The act of unconsciously sticking ones tongue out while engaging in an activity that requires mental skill, physical coordination, and/or dexterity.

  1. Word: Vegaquarian

Definition: Like a vegetarian, a vegaquarian does not eat meat only they don’t recognise that sea animals have feelings too and eat them also.

  1. Phrase: Sidewalk Salsa

Definition: When you walk up to someone on the sidewalk and you both try to move out of each other’s way, and in doing so repeatedly move into each other’s way.

  1. Phrase: Defensive Eating

Definition: Strategically consuming food for the sole purpose of preventing others from getting it.

  1. Word: Internest

Definition: The cocoon of blankets, pillows, duvets, and comfy things you gather around yourself to keep warm whilst spending long amounts of time on the internet.

  1. Phrase: Freshman at life

Definition: Someone who simply has no clue what they’re doing in life. They have no common sense and ask stupid questions such as “how do I do laundry?” or “what is online banking?”

  1. Phrase: Nicholas Cage Syndrome

Definition: When you have the same facial expression no matter what emotion you’re supposed to be showing.

  1. Phrase: Deja poo

Definition: The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before.

So there you are. Don’t say I never teach you anything.

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