28 text posts that will make you want to befriend everyone on tumblr: fourth edition

The problem with Les Miserables is that you can say it wrong and sound like a douche or you can say it right and sound like a douche” – wallahbroapologist

“True dedication is blogging despite the fact that no one is paying attention to you” – canadad

“Jellyfish are just wet ghosts” – lampshaming

“Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti” – offgloss

“Get rich or cry tryin” – sadboyshotta

“Do you realise that it takes 3 sheep to make one sweater???? Amazing, I didn’t even know they could knit” – hydratedbitch

“There is no reason for ‘Sean’ to be pronounced ‘Shawn'” – inbox

“My fashion sense is called I am cold and pissed off” – pomeray

“Dear people who walk up two steps at a time on the stairs: What do you need to prove?” – slimyhipster

“Don’t!!!! fake!!!! your!!!! interests!!!! to!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!! you!!!!” – frickgerard

“Who decided that growing a beard was a replacement for a personality” – redwineandcigs

“Working in retail: Me: ‘hi how are you today? Customer: ‘JUST LOOKING'” – nonuckles

“Instead of sending people to prison we should just make them eat the little stringy things off bananas” – tinychatter

“I hate when adults make fun of you and ask if you bought your jeans with all the holes in them…why don’t you go fix the holes in our economy Robert” – mixedgf

“Teacher: what inspired you to write this essay? Me: The due date.” – smoke

“Me after a cup of coffee: I am beautiful and fast” – snailina

“I want kids but I’m scared they’ll blame me if they’re ugly” – suspend

“My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta” – justbadpuns

“I can’t believe I used to think people my age were adults” – grapefruitmimosa

“Girls who smile at other girls while walking down the street instead of death staring them are the type of girls you need in your life” – whyisntketchupasmoothie

“Hello, Police? I accidently stepped on my cat’s foot and need to be arrested” – chickentreat

“Appreciation post for myself because I have tolerated myself for every second of my existence” – canadad

“Why is everyone so mean. How are you not tired?” – bathbug

“The Tumblr app is almost as shit as your comment that I can’t delete” – zombles

“My life can be most accurately described by the sound a wet sponge makes when you throw it on the floor” – text-posters

“Interests: that little fast walk birds outside do when they wanna get away from you but they’re not like super committed” – bombcollar

“If you stand in front of a mirror at midnight and say your Ex’s name 3 times Drake shows up and cries with you” – earlcudifan

“It’s called being condescending maybe you’ve heard of it” – morefunthanb4

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