It won’t come as a shock to the people who know me well that I haven’t been myself for what feels like a really long time now.
The reason I wanted to talk about this is because as I am getting older, I’m learning that finding things difficult on occasion is something that we shouldn’t be ashamed of.
Also, I’m a strong believer that if I share the great parts of my life on this blog, I should be just as willing to show the not so great times as well. After all, it is important to accept that stress and sometimes not feeling your best is just a part of life isn’t it?
It’s quite common to hear that someone sufferers with an anxiety disorder so I was always conscious about the fact that I really didn’t want to be just another statistic. But I then realised what was actually important, and that is getting better. It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.
Let me make an attempt to explain myself a little bit clearer. I am completely aware that the “About” section of my blog states that I do stand-up comedy, and I did. However, since beginning my treatment for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, I really haven’t felt that I can make people laugh anymore. Do you think it’s possible to lose your “funny”? Because at this stage of my life it feels as though I have.
Having said that, my personality hasn’t just been affected when it comes to making people laugh. Many aspects of my life feel as though they have taken a hit. My writing, my individuality and my style.
I know a lot of people may think that sounds materialistic but to me, style was something that I had always taken great interest in, more so since I started working at COS.
Another one of the areas I have found difficult to deal with is my ability to inject personality into my writing. Without meaning to sound dramatic, how do you go about doing that when you don’t feel as though you know what your personality even is anymore? (Existential crisis alert)
Being so engrossed in recovery has left me with little time to worry or even care about being funny, or stylish, or any of these things because my priorities have shifted.
I pride myself on being original but I have really been struggling to even put pen to paper and my lack of content and stronger emphasis on photography is proof of this.
I just re-read what I have written and its starting to sound a bit “woe is me” so Imma’ wrap this up.
What I’m trying to say is, if I knew a sure fire way to get my mojo back, I would bottle it up and sell it. However I do think that there are little steps we can take to help us on our way.
1. Stop obsessing over perceived problems
Instead of focusing all of your energy on negative thought processes, try and redirect your brain to become more absorbed in constructive and positive pursuits.
Feeling more productive is such an awesome way to counteract whatever negative things you’re feeling. This is where creative therapy can come into play.
2. Creative Therapy
Allowing yourself to become externally engaged in creativity can be a great way to take your mind off of whatever anxieties you feel are holding you back. Paint, draw, write, do whatever. The beauty of creativity is that the way you choose to express it is completely down to you.
3. Escape Mentally
Be conscious of any material that you find calming and make time for it.
Quite often, hearing just one song can flip my mood completely. The same goes for certain films, TV shows or even places.
Making a note of the things you find comforting is a popular and effective way to take your mind off of things.
4. Keep a Journal
Having a journal is great for providing an outlet to not only help you organise your thoughts better and maybe help you get out of your funk, but also to vent. Take advantage.
5. Try and stay away from social media for a little while
Something about social media really doesn’t sit well with me. I just feel it has too much of a presence in society these days and it is easy to look at someone’s edited version of their lives and feel in awe/inadequate. When in fact, we are all just normal people.
Don’t get me wrong, I am on social media, and it is a bit of a double edged sword really because on one hand, It can provide a great platform to express your creativity and I am definitely guilty of falling into the social media trap at times.
However, when you’re not feeling like yourself, I think it is helpful to stay away from anything that impacts your self-esteem, interaction and awareness of the world we live in. Just until you have had enough time to get your thoughts together and make more sense of things.
6. Green Therapy
One of the most productive and effective ways to clear your head, is to make the most of nature. Whether you choose to go for a quick walk on your lunch break or a lengthy stroll on the weekend, it’s a way to find instant results.
This is the one that we hear the most and when you’re feeling stressed or anxious, getting yourself motivated can often prove itself to be a challenge. But make yourself do it. I have never worked out and regretted it but I always regret the times when I don’t. It all about reclaiming your energy to allow yourself to be the best version of you possible.
Also anything that provides you with a positive distraction away from your internal anxieties can’t be a bad thing can it?
This one is so simple but is quite often forgotten. Spinning plates is only going to fill your mind with even more worry and anxiety. Get off of the Hamster wheel and focus on yourself.
9. Take baby steps
Things take time. If you try and jump in with both feet, you are going to get so overwhelmed that it will most likely do more bad than good. Setting yourself little goals is a much more productive way to tackle things.
Hope this helps!