An Official Goodbye To My Younger Self.

It hit home that I’m a fully fledged adult a few days ago when my friend Sophia gave me a ring and asked what I was up to. I found myself reply “I’m just off to buy some fabric softener mate.” And then BOOM. Like a frisbee to the head, it hit me. There’s no going back.

Now, you may be thinking “hang on a hot minute. She’s 27 and she’s only just noticed?” But I’d be lying to you if I said that I’d ever told someone that I was off to buy laundry products as enthusiastically as I did during that phone call.

“As well as realising that 80% of my adult life is saying ‘I need to put a wash on’, I realised that I was looking forward to getting all of my little jobs done”

It began to sink in further a few days later when I started making my way through my to-do list: wash towels, wash whites, wash darks, wipe down sides, organise drawers.

As well as noticing that 80% of my adult life is saying “I need to put a wash on”, I realised that I was strangely looking forward to getting all of my little jobs done. If my life was a movie this would definitely be the scene where I would walk up to a mirror and dramatically ask “Who are you and what have you done with Henna?”

I used the word “trendy” three times last week along with my personal favourite phrase “hip, cool and happening”. I especially felt like a tool bag when I began a sentence with “when I’m folding my laundry…” to which my friend swiftly interrupted with a laid back “Mate. I don’t even fold mine.”

Obviously, over the years there have been moments of realising things that would have completely gone over my head when I was in my late teens. You know, like the time I recognised John Craven in my local supermarket (Google him), and the sense of satisfaction I got after using a steamer on my wooden floor for the first time, but no real moment where I thought “Oh. This is it now. I really have to get my shit together.”

“It’s funny how shit jokes don’t get better with age though isn’t it? How convenient.”

My jokes are starting to get worse too. My sister was moaning that she had to squint at the beach because she had forgotten to pack her sunglasses so I called her “Squinten Blake”. It was hilarious at the time ok?! It’s funny how shit jokes don’t get better with age though isn’t it? How convenient.

I have a drawer dedicated to my bags for life. I listen more than I speak. I have found my signature scent and I can give advice with experience behind it to back me up. I worry about the state of the world more and more as the years go by and my desk looks different. Instead of being full of things that look nice but go untouched, it now holds stacks of paper containing all of the thoughts that I somehow struggle to vocalise.

“As we get older life likes to throw shit at us every now and again like some sort of warped gamed of dodgeball”

Although I sometimes  feel a sense of sadness when I think about how a lot of my twenties so far have been spent worrying that I’m not good enough, I’m learning to trust the process.

For some, growing older can feel quite daunting but the older I get, the happier I become. Yes, as we get older life likes to throw shit at us every now and again like some sort of warped game of dodgeball but I’m embracing the fact that I’m becoming a prouder member of the “stay at home” club the older I get and that I love cats more than most people.

H x


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